Begging For Billions

We are as free to hold tight to our beliefs as Big Shots are to hold tight to their Midas-like fortunes.  I believe I speak for millions when I say I am astonished afresh by the stinginess and mean-spiritedness of America’s Top One Percenters.  Back in the day…you know, when dinosaurs roamed the earth…they used to say, “You oughtta be ashamed of yourself.”

But the Conscienceless Uber Rich are shameless.  It is disgusting that the tippy-top of the Top One Percent sits silently in their counting houses waiting for the Deals that will come into stark relief once all the crap has been bought up by a tax-ravaged citizenry.  AND they don’t care that it is disgusting.  I believe the expression is that they, “laugh their way to the bank.”

It IS disgusting, they ARE disgusting…what’re they gonna do about it?  Sue me?

 Not bloody likely.  They may not be traitors but, almost without exception, they are the most extraordinary cheapskates.  I will argue that some of them ARE Traitors.  

 I will propose a word problem, such as one might (and I contend ought) to learn how to solve in our excellent public school system.  I know many object to public education, both that it is compulsory and that it is expensive, but I implore them to re-visit their positions.  The only thing more dangerous and more unruly than Bad Guys is Ignorant Masses.

 Secretary Paulson, who we have every reason to suspect of malfeasance, deems that the markets MUST have an infusion of at least $700 billion.  We’re not sure whether that’s the $700 billion that was funneled on schedule, while millions of people were distractedly making urgent and heartfelt appeals to their elected representatives NOT to do exactly that.  I will assume that $700 billion is still the skeletal price of admission.

 Inspiring wider positive impact on the Market, Warren Buffet invested $5 billion dollars last week in floundering Goldman Sachs.  It being so strikingly coincidental, it seems worth noting that Secretary Paulson was CEO of Goldman Sachs before he became “secretary” of the Treasury of the United States of America.  Also that, until yesterday anyway, he was estimated to be worth more than SEVEN HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS.

Wall Street higher on Buffet’s Goldman investment

  www.chinaview.cn  2008-09-24 22:06:59

 NEW YORK, Sept. 24 (Xinhua) — Wall Street climbed in early trading Wednesday, after Goldman Sachs won 5 billion U.S. dollars investment from Warren Buffet’s Berkshire Hathaway Inc.

 Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway said Tuesday it would invest at least 5 billion dollars in preferred stock of Goldman Sachs. In addition, Berkshire also got warrants to buy another 5 billion dollars in Goldman’s common stock. Meanwhile, Goldman also said late Tuesday it would raise another 2.5 billion dollars in its equity offering.

 The news bolstered confidence in the nation’s banking system and sent shares of Goldman Sachs and major indexes higher.

  Moreover, the market also awaited progress in the U.S. government’s financial rescue package. Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke are scheduled to appear before Congress for a second day Wednesday on a 700-billion-dollar bailout plan to rescue financial services firms.

 Oil prices perked up Wednesday. Light, sweet crude for November delivery rose 2.49 dollars to 109.10 dollars a barrel on the New York Mercantile Exchange.

Editor: Yao

http://news.xinhuanet.com/english/2008-09/24/content_10104824.htm

 In 2007, America topped the charts with 449 American billionaires.  I spy new a new Olympic event…Money Changing.  What could be of fiercer competition or greater worldwide interest than no-holds-barred money manufacture and manipulation.  Whoever ends up with the most, wins.  THAT’S the stuff of ‘Root, root, root for the home team.’  

I’m trying to think how “there’s no ‘I’ in team” squares with mounting evidence that there is also no ‘home’ in home team.

 Russia came in a distant second, with 87 billionaires, though I have heard that Russia is now gaining billionaires at a faster rate than the U.S., or maybe it was faster than anyone.  That’s whatcha call hearsay. The wikipedia entry to which I refer contains a list of the number of billionaires by country, and a separate list of the number of billionaire bona fide Ruling Elite.  Parenthetically, there is no entry for China on either list…which speaks trillions.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_the_number_of_billionaires 

 It is reasonable to suppose that several more billionaires were “made” in 2008.  It is equally reasonable to suppose, particularly after yesterday, that several have been knocked off their pedestals…which is NOT to say out of their Ivory Towers.

 If you were worth $50 million last month and you’re worth $25 million this week…and make no mistake, there ARE such people…I’m not gonna lie, that’s a hit.  Not a heartbreaker, except for the Loser.  It surely doesn’t warrant government intervention but, equally surely, that’s a hit that will command a few life changes.

 One of the tricks to word problems is sorting through what’s relevant and what’s not.  That last paragraph…while provocative on its face and key, I think, to some bigger picture issues…has no bearing on the word problem.  Nor, I happen to already know, does the next paragraph.

 In what used to be called Generally Accepted Accounting Practices, it is customary to round down…to be conservative.

 It is not conservative to assume a basic monthly nut of, say, $3179 against a salary of $36,000 per year by deluding yourself that they both constitute “basically,” “roughly,” “right about,” “pretty much exactly,”  $3000 per month.

 It is conservative to suppose that there are 400 American billionaires.

 X = $5 billion, the value of Warren Buffet’s investment in Goldman Sachs.

 Y = 400, the number of American billionaires.

 Z = number of American billionaires who would have to make same investment as Warren Buffet in order to produce aggregate infusion of capital of $700 billion

(EXTRA CREDIT, 10/6/08: Solve also for Q = $850,000,000,000)

 Part I: 

Does America have enough billionaires that, if they each invested the same amount that Warren Buffet invested, it would collectively constitute a cash infusion of $700 billion and, if so, how many American billionaires who largely made their billions off of America would have to step up the plate of Service To Country?

 PART II:

The original not-a-bailout bailout was deemed to be necessary “by” last Friday or hellfire and damnation upon us.  Others hold that the first of the month/payroll i.e. tomorrow is the date by which, without cash infusion, hellfire and damnation upon us.  The original bill was not passed by last Friday, nor did hellfire and damnation rain down.  Do you have enough information to determine whether claims about the first of the month are true?

 PART III:

Setting the language of the Constitution aside but bearing in mind only highest principles, write a paragraph on whether those who are  established upon an incomprehensibly high socioeconomic plane might reasonably be expected under the implied Social Contract to exercise largesse at times of particular societal distress.  Send it to the people who are well paid, by you, to claim they represent you.